Alcohol Quotes and Sayings

Posted by Brian

A meal without wine is like a day without sunshine, except that on a day without sunshine you can still get drunk.

A man who exposes himself when he is intoxicated, has not the art of getting drunk.

A hangover is the wrath of grapes.

A bartender is just a pharmacist with a limited inventory.

Alcohol is necessary for a man so that he can have a good opinion of himself, undisturbed be the facts.

Always remember that I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me.

Always do sober what you said you’d do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut.

An alcoholic is someone you don’t like who drinks as much as you do.

A man ought not never to get drunk above the neck.

A woman drove me to drink and I never even had the courtesy to thank her.

A drunken man is fitly named: he has drank, till he is drunken: the wine swallows his consciousness, and it sinks therein.

Beer is the cause and solution to all of life’s problems.

Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.

Better belly burst than good liquor be lost.

Be wary of strong drink. It can make you shoot at tax collectors… and miss.

Cocaine is gods way of telling you that you make too much money.

Cigarettes and coffee: an alcoholic’s best friend !!!!

Drink the first. Sip the second slowly. Skip the third. ~Knute Rockne

Don’t drink and drive, you might hit a bump and spill your drink.

Drinking makes such fools of people, and people are such fools to begin with, that it’s compounding a felony.

Draft beer, not people.

Drunkenness is nothing but voluntary madness.

Drunkenness is temporary suicide.

Even though a number of people have tried, no one has yet found a way to drink for a living.

Everyone who drinks is not a poet. Some of us drink because we’re not poets.

Everybody should believe in something; I believe I’ll have another drink.

First you take a drink, then the drink takes a drink, then the drink takes you.

Health – what my friends are always drinking to before they fall down.

How come if alcohol kills millions of brain cells, it never killed the ones that made me want to drink?

I think a man ought to get drunk at least twice a year just on principle, so he won’t let himself get snotty about it.

I stopped drinking, but only when I sleep.

I drink to forget I drink.

I would take a bomb, but I can’t stand the noise.

I like whiskey. I always did, and that is why I never drink it.

I like liquor – its taste and its effects – and that is just the reason why I never drink it.

I hate to advocate drugs, alcohol, violence, or insanity to anyone, but they always worked for me.

If drinking is interfering with your work, you’re probably a heavy drinker. If work is interfering with your drinking, you’re probably an alcoholic.

If four or five guys tell you that you’re drunk, even though you know you haven’t had a thing to drink, the least you can do is to lie down a little while.

Life’s a waste of time, time’s a waste of life so let’s all get wasted and have the time of our life.

My grandmother is over eighty and still doesn’t need glasses. Drinks right out of the bottle.

No poems can please for long or live that are written by water-drinkers.

No animal ever invented anything so bad as drunkeness – or so good as drink.

Never cry over spilt milk. It could’ve been whiskey.

One reason I don’t drink is that I want to know when I am having a good time.

O God, that men should put an enemy in their mouths to steal away their brains! that we should, with joy, pleasance, revel, and applause, transform ourselves into beasts!

Once, during Prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water.

Prohibition may be a disputed theory, but none can say that it doesn’t hold water.

Reality is a crutch for people who can’t handle drugs.

Stay busy, get plenty of exercise, and don’t drink too much. Then again, don’t drink too little.

This is one of the disadvantages of wine: it makes a man mistake words for thought.

Time is never wasted when you’re wasted all the time.

This is one of the disadvantages of wine: it makes a man mistake words for thought.

The consumption of alcohol may cause pregnancy.

There is a devil in every berry of the grape.

The first glass is for myself, the second for my friends, the third for good humor, and the forth for my enemies.

When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.

We borrowed golf from Scotland as we borrowed whiskey. Not because it is Scottish, but because it is good.

Wine gives a man nothing… it only puts in motion what had been locked up in frost.

Wine is sunlight, held together by water.

You’re not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.

Your body is a temple, but keep the spirits on the outside.

You don’t have to be a beer drinker to play darts, but it helps.

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